精品爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話集

　　年少無(wú)知

　　Jimmy is three years old.

　　吉米3歲了。

　　One day, he was gazing out of the window when the night fell. He suddenly shouted, "Mum, mum, come close the window!"

　　一天，他正在窗口觀望，夜幕降臨。他突然喊道：“媽媽，媽媽，快來(lái)關(guān)窗!”

　　"Why? It's not cold, sonny."

　　“為什么?天不冷呀，寶貝。”

　　"Yes, mum, but the night will come inside."

　　“是的，媽媽，可黑夜會(huì)進(jìn)來(lái)。”

　　快速靠岸

　　A guy I know was towing his boat home from a fishing trip to Lake Huron when his car broke down. He didn't have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be able to raise someone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance. He climbed into his boat, clicked on the radio and said, "Mayday, mayday." A Coast Guard officer came on and said, "State your location." "I-75, two miles south of Standish." After a very long pause, the officer asked, "How fast were you going when you reached shore?"

　　在休倫湖釣完魚后，我的一個(gè)朋友開(kāi)車拖著他的船回家。路上車壞了。 他沒(méi)帶手機(jī)，不過(guò)，他想，也許他可以通過(guò)海事無(wú)線廣播來(lái)請(qǐng)求公路援助。 于是，他爬到他的船里面，啟動(dòng)了無(wú)線裝置，喊道，“求救，求救”。一名海岸護(hù)衛(wèi)隊(duì)警官作出了回應(yīng)，“報(bào)告你的位置”。“I-75號(hào)公路，Standish的`南面兩英里”。沉默了好一會(huì)之后，警官問(wèn)我的朋友，“你的船靠岸時(shí)開(kāi)得有多快?”

　　冰箱里的小兔子

　　A lady opened her refrigerator and saw a rabbit sitting on one of the shelves, "What are you doing in there?" she asked.

　　一位女士打開(kāi)冰箱門，發(fā)現(xiàn)一只兔子坐在其中的一層隔板上，就問(wèn)它：“你在那里做什么?”

　　The rabbit replied, "This is a Westinghouse, isn't it?"

　　兔子回答：“這是Westinghouse對(duì)不對(duì)?”(Westinghouse，西屋電氣公司)

　　The lady confirmed, "Yes."

　　女士確認(rèn)道：“沒(méi)錯(cuò)。”

　　"Well," the rabbit said,"I'm westing."

　　兔子說(shuō)：“那就對(duì)了，我就是要往西邊去。”

　　Rabbit: Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me?

　　兔子：你確信這瓶特制胡蘿卜汁能治好我的病?

　　Doctor: Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another.

　　醫(yī)生：當(dāng)然咯，凡是喝過(guò)的兔子沒(méi)有一只來(lái)要第二瓶的。

　　Baby Rabbit: Mommy, where did I come from?

　　兔寶寶：媽咪，我是從哪兒來(lái)的呢?

　　Mother Rabbit: I'll tell you when you're older.

　　兔媽媽：等你長(zhǎng)大點(diǎn)再告訴你。

　　Baby Rabbit: Oh, Mommy, please, tell me now.

　　兔寶寶：噢媽咪，現(xiàn)在就告訴我吧，求您了。

　　Mother Rabbit: If you must know, you were pulled from a magician's hat.

　　兔媽媽：如果你一定要知道，那我告訴你你是從魔術(shù)師的帽子里被拽出來(lái)的。

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